There are more photographs of a wedding than of any other three days in most people’s lives, and almost none of the year that follows it.
That year is the one with the change in it — a new house, two families becoming one set of obligations, the discovery of how the other person actually lives. None of it is photographed, because none of it looks like an occasion.
Give it to both of them
The distinguishing decision for this diary, and the one that makes it work.
Two people, one book, alternating entries. It becomes a conversation rather than a journal, and a conversation is far more likely to be continued — if one of them stops, the other notices.
It also produces the thing worth having in ten years: two accounts of the same year, which almost never agree.
| One writer | Two writers |
|---|---|
| Stops quietly | The other one notices |
| One perspective | Two, and they differ |
| Private | Shared, which changes what gets written |
| Fills unevenly | Fills alternately, which paces it |
Hand over the mechanics as well as the idea. The simplest rule that works: whoever has just written moves the ribbon marker to the next blank page and leaves the diary on the other’s side of the bed or desk. Nobody has to ask whose turn it is, and a diary sitting on your side for a fortnight is a reminder that does not need saying.
⚠️ Say this out loud when you give it. A diary handed to a couple without instruction is a diary one of them assumes is for the other.
What to print at the front
The wedding — but briefly. Six to eight photographs, not sixty. The wedding has its own book and this is not it. Best format for a wedding →
Better at the front: the years before the wedding. The flat, the friends, the two of them when nobody was organising anything. Very few couples have that printed anywhere.
The cover
The diary’s hard cover is printed with a photograph and a name, and for a couple both need a little thought.
Both first names, and nothing else. Whether one of them is changing a surname, keeping it or joining two is a conversation that may still be going on; first names step around it entirely, and they are what the two of them call each other anyway.
A photograph from after the wedding, not of it. The first week in the new place, the two of them on a scooter, a table with too many dishes on it. A wedding portrait on the cover turns the whole diary back towards the day it is meant to move on from.
The firsts of the first year
A prompt list that suits this diary and no other. Every one of these happens once, in the first year, and almost none of them is photographed:
| The first | Worth writing, by |
|---|---|
| Festival hosted as a couple | Whoever did the cooking |
| Festival spent at the in-laws’ | The one for whom it was new |
| Both families at one table | Both of you, separately, the same night |
| Argument about money | Each of you, a week later |
| One of you ill, the other in charge | The one who was in charge |
| A guest who stays too long | Whoever had to be polite |
| The first anniversary | Both, on the same page |
The festival rows are the richest, because the first Diwali, Eid, Christmas or Onam after a wedding is where two sets of habits meet for the first time. The first Diwali after a wedding →
If it is an arranged marriage
Then this diary is worth more, not less. Two people who met a few months ago are getting to know each other in real time, and that year is never repeated or reconstructed later — by the second anniversary nobody remembers not knowing how the other takes their tea.
Two adjustments:
- The front is the short run-up: the first meeting, the roka or the engagement, the photographs from those months. It may be all there is, and it is enough.
- Give it with an easy out. Writing to each other takes a trust that may still be forming. Say that one line a week is plenty, and that the diary can sit untouched for a month without having failed.
Gifting an arranged match before the wedding →
When to give it
Not at the wedding. There are forty gifts there and this one needs an explanation.
A few weeks after, when the house is quiet and the year is actually starting. That is also when the couple is most likely to have an evening in which to start it. What to give the couple after the wedding →
What it costs
| Size | Pages | Price |
|---|---|---|
| 60 sheets | 120 | ₹699 |
| 80 sheets | 160 | ₹899 |
Two people writing fills faster than one, so 80 sheets is reasonable here where it is not for most single-writer diaries. Flat ₹70 delivery anywhere in India.
Frequently asked
Is a diary a good wedding gift? Not at the wedding itself. A few weeks after, when the year is actually starting and there is an evening to begin it.
Should both of them write in it? Yes, alternating. It becomes a conversation rather than a journal, and it is much more likely to be continued.
How much of the wedding should be printed in it? Six to eight photographs. The wedding has its own book; this is about the year after.
What size? 80 sheets is reasonable because two people fill it faster. 60 is fine for one writer.
What is the best thing to print at the front? The years before the wedding. Almost no couple has those printed anywhere.
Part of our guide to photo diaries and card decks. See also: a diary for a pregnancy and what to give the couple after the wedding.
For the first year: Photo Diary from ₹699 · Personalised wedding gifts