Different from disliking a particular photograph. This is somebody saying they would rather not appear at all — in a group book, a farewell deck, a family album, a book of a friendship.
It happens more than people expect and it is usually handled badly, in both directions.
The default is straightforward
Take them out.
It costs nothing, the book is almost never worse for it, and there is no version of this where overriding somebody is the right call on a gift. A person who has asked not to be in something and finds themselves in it has been told their answer did not matter.
And do not negotiate. “Just this one, though?” turns a stated preference into a conversation they now have to have twice.
Why people ask, and why it is not personal
Worth knowing, because the request often lands as a rejection of the project.
Privacy, generally. Some people simply do not want their face in circulation, and a printed object passed around a room is circulation.
Something is going on. A situation with family, an ex, work, a legal matter, something health-related. You will not be told and it is not yours to know.
They dislike being photographed. Which is not the same as disliking you or the book.
They are not sure who will see it. A group book has an unknown audience, and that is a reasonable thing to be careful about.
The one case worth a conversation
A group record where they are structurally part of it — a team of eight, a farewell for somebody they worked beside for five years, a wedding party.
Even here the answer is not “use it anyway”. It is to offer alternatives:
| Instead of a photograph | |
|---|---|
| A written line from them | Present, no image |
| A photograph from behind, or a hand | Present, unidentifiable |
| Their name in a list of who was there | The record stays complete |
| A photograph of something of theirs | Their desk, their handwriting |
Most people who decline a photograph are happy with one of these, because the objection is usually to the image rather than to being mentioned.
Children, and who decides
A separate case with its own guide, because the person in the photograph is not the person being asked. Photographs of other people’s children →
Where we sit
We print what you send. We have no way of knowing who consented to what, and no product in our range does — that is true of every printer.
⚠️ Which means the consent question is entirely upstream of us, and worth settling before you order rather than at the proof, when the layout is already built around a photograph that now has to come out. Will you sign an NDA for private photos? →
Frequently asked
What if someone does not want their photo in a book? Take them out. It costs nothing and the book is almost never worse for it.
Should I ask them why? No. The reason is frequently something they are not going to tell you, and it does not change the answer.
What about a group record they were part of? Offer alternatives — a written line, a photograph of something of theirs, or just their name. Most people accept one of those.
Do you check whether people consented? No. We print what is sent, like any printer. That decision is entirely yours to make before ordering.
When should I settle this? Before ordering. At the proof stage the layout is already built around the photograph.
Part of our guide to choosing photographs. See also: photographs where someone looks bad and photographs of an ex-partner.
Settle it before you order: Photo magazines from ₹499 · All 11 keepsakes